Orange vs Northern Vance

[tatermommy]

At Awful House rechraunch in Hillsburry, greasy food slides
'Mo's coaching staff eats ham and eggs that looks like donkey hide
Their arteries turn to water hoses as their faces get sorta blue
And dream of having a Shrine Bowl player really will come true

The waitress is their hot movie star
Her teef are gone and she smells like tar
She cant see
She uses roadkill for a mop
They leer at her while their buscuits sop
Up all the red eye gravy

Somewhere on a napkin are plays they devise
While they swap Jimmy Swaggert stories and JJ's huntin' story lies

The dog licks the plates among the big blue flies
And lets go join them, next week, you and I,

 

[1052]

This could be a really good game. N Vance is very athletic. Will Orange continue its stampede style of offense.

 

[1052]

Bryse Wilson is not on the Shrine Bowl team. Why does the Shrine Bowl committee have a bias against a Moser coached team. Could it be that to qualify for the team a coach has to beat a Moser team in a real game.

 

[Huey Long]

Whose your daddy?

Year Winner Score Shrine Bowl
2014 South Carolina 21-12
2013 South Carolina 28-23
2012 South Carolina 23-19
2011 North Carolina 26-19
2010 South Carolina 42-10
2009 North Carolina 24-14
2008 South Carolina 24-16
2007 South Carolina

 

[orangecrush52]

There has always been a negative bias against a Moser coached team. Coaching for 12 years, having 9 teams ranked in the AP top ten, winning a state championship, three appearances in regional finals, 9 conference championship games, against one losing season. He is the Jerry Kramer of Shrine Bowl football.

 

[tatermommy]

SPECIAL REPORT
How to make the NC Shrine Bowl Team
1) Be a big fish in a little pond.
2) Think that losing builds character.
3) Do not play on a top ten ranked team.
4) Enjoy losing to the South.
5) Be a losing coach to several Moser coached teams.

 

[Huey Long]

To get on the NC Shrine Bowl team a player has to be a favorite or be made a favorite of a Shrine Bowl coach. In SC the player has to be a good player.

 

[tatermommy]

Meanwhile back at the ranch... 'NoBowlMo' and his marry band of the overlooked are busy wringing out the uni's fum last weeks mud bowl. Rumor has it that upon diligent research the Great Chief Hrine-Sha Owl-Bay of the Sandlapper Tribe felt so sorry fer his northern brothers after the great beaver pelt hunt that he pulled the NC state line south with his bear hands thus creating NC down east..

 

[tatermommy]

They orders the buiscuits with barbwire
They use a copperhead snake for a necktie
Their fieldhouse on 70 where buzzards glide
Is made outta Panther hides
The goal posts are piled up on top
Made out of a losers skulls
As the team takes the field ''Mo'' grabs the mike an bellers '' Tell me who do you love!''

[Chorus:]
Who do you love
Who do you love
Who do you love
Who do you love

Their winnin ways are like a thorny vine
If ya think ya can they dont mind ya tryin
'Mo' calls plays using a
rattlesnake whip
Take it easy baby don't give 'Leblaster' no lip
Who do you love!

[Chorus]

Flags fly in the dark
'Mo's face has turned blue
Down the field the offense flew
The other team looked at them an somebody screamed
What they put on em noboddy had seen
Who do you love!

[Chorus]

When Earnie hired 'Mo' he said, 'We aint got much time'!
On the opposite stands 'Mo' put a 'Dead End' sign
He rode a lion thru their town using a
rattlesnake whip
Wif a Clint Eastwood smirk on his lip
He took his team by the hand
Said,' owee boys we goin to the promise land'
Along the way we goin to raise some sand
Hey if ya aint a Panther player ya aint a real man
Who do you love!

[Chorus]

 

[77football]

Should be a close game.

 

[tatermommy]

Holy 'Bushy Cook' its Homecoming in Hillsburry. Its time to buy non tax paid concoctions and get yer cuzzins outta jail and pour lawnmower gas into the truck and head to Panther Palace.

 

[tatermommy]

Halftime Seremonies
1) Whose sister has the most names tattooed on her wherever.
2) Whose ex wife has her number on the most bathroom walls that she called back.
3) Which father will be the first served with nonsupport papers at the game.
4) Who will be the first to be recognized by several different police agencies.
5) Who has the most boogers under the drivers seat.
6) Who is has the highest bail bond.
7) Who traveled from the furthest jail.
8) Who can spit backer juice further down several rows of seats.
9) Which fambly will the first to get arrested at Waffle House in the AM.
10) Who will remove a grill from a truck with the deer still attached and put it on a cooker in the parking lot.

 

[Huey Long]

The Orange JV's are streaking through their schedule. They have a better winning percentage that the varsity since Coach Moser took over. And the middle school feeder teams are looking great also.

 

[Huey Long]

The Orange JV's are streaking through their schedule. They have a better winning percentage that the varsity since Coach Moser took over. And the middle school feeder teams are looking great also.

 

[Brutus B]

Orange wins 48-0